Mr. Right Omg he is so right!

So last night my "friend boy" called me and he gave me his excuse for not calling in a while. Now while I was sad and thinking he was ignoring and going on another one of his vacations from life, that he is so famous for his shitty phone, which I knew was shitty finally broke in two despise the duct tape and glue. Now while I took his excuse and really did miss him I felt like I am being a push over. I have always been the dominating one, always the one RUNNING THINGS. Now lets all rewind to the beginning so we can understand the drama of today......<>cloudy smoke>

Ok so in late September I met this guy named "L." Now L had a girlfriend but we were and still are just friends. Now he came to pick me up one night and told me to bring a friend for his friend. Now I am usually against this but I didn't want to go by myself. Funny thing is when we got in the car his friend was in the front seat and he turned around to speak..... I was at a lost for words.

(Now it has been said that no one on this earth has been so properly named
than myself "GABrielle" so me lost for words is not a regular
thing)

So he turned around and he said hello and I was infatuated. When actually we went to HIS house and then we stayed there until about 4 am the next morning. Now while I was suppose to be "spending time" with my friend I wanted to be with HIM. So once he went to sleep I was ready to leave. The next day I get on the Internet and he wrote me a message saying he missed me already (FAST I know) But I actually missed him too. We began to chat and actually exchanged numbers and went on a date two days later. Now your probably wondering what happened to L, well B happened to L. lol But no really you know how you feel more beautiful when your with a certain person. He made me feel like God was smiling on me. I prayed to God for a while to send me someone to make me grow and change for the better and I promise readers I'll keep you updated.

Ok so back to tonights drama......
So L calls me and says that he wants me to get some friends together and to come and hang with his friends. Now while I thought that B told him about us... HE DIDN'T!!! So I call B and no answer... I call L back and I asked him when was the last time he talked to B, he said that he spoke with him last night. Now I asked was I mentioned in any conversations for the last couple months, he said NO. So I'm thinking like, now I look like the ass that has to tell him. So I tell him that we have been dating and that it's been for a while now.... he is like "Oh well he didn't tell me, but it's cool, now you told me so he doesn't have to know we discussed this." Me being the faith full "friend girl" I am I told him. After I asked why he gave me this

"I asked you was there anything between you all and you said no, and so did he,
So me being the grown man I am I felt like I didn't need to ask him anything, or
put my business out there."

So I said ok and I understood. Now this is the thing, why am I being the girl? I am never the girl! Who is this man to have the right answers and know the right things to say, how to rub my back, make me breakfast and handle me perfectly?? Oh he is the one.... maybe not the one one, but defiantly one of the ones we woman will never forget. I mean the situation could have gotten out of hand but he soothed me. I am falling and I refuse to say the _ _ _ _ word because I don't want to jinx it. But what scares me and most black women in the world or just women in general is what happens when it all goes wrong?? What happens when I am writing a blog about my heart being ripped apart and feeling like listening to Mary J and eating Chinese food? Who will be the next "one?" Or if I mess this one up will there even be another one?? Will I let my fear of failure exceed my will to succeed? I care so much it scares me, I find myself confused about which ringer to give him because every slow song reminds me of him. Ladies you know what its like when your a little girl and you imagine the perfect man? You say what you want him to look like, what you want him to do, how you want him to act, how he'll dress, what kind of car he'll drive and the way you'll kiss the first time, the first time THAT goes down lol, how he'll text you sweet things, be rough but gentle at the same time, get out of arguments and be able to admit he is wrong, treat you like a queen even when your dressed like the milk maid?? Yeah you know what I mean..... but one thing we never think of is what happens when we get him? We never discuss what we will have to be for him, do for him and say. We always dream the dream but never the end.... I thinks that's the reason why you always wake up before your finished dreaming, because your left to figure the rest out by yourself..... I'm figuring it now.